They may act like gold, but they're nothing more than spray-painted pyrite

My thoughts today: purely rageful. I can't even begin to express the idea of being mad; I'm purely enraged. 

1.) People who try to fix other people's flaws before theirs

Please don't preach your thoughts and ideas to other people whenever you can't follow them yourself. Just a hint, whenever you start telling other people to become closer to God, how about you fix your relationship with him first. I don't see how you can constantly talk about coming together and being closer to people when you can sit there and literally say nothing nice about anyone until you see them in front of you. Just a hint, don't try and be best friends with my close friends and then say nothing nice about them when you're around your boojie friends. You have 297 people to talk about, keep the other three out of your mouth.

2.) Using the "God card"

Your intentions may be good, but you're going about it the wrong way. Please stop using God to make yourself seem like the person you aren't. The mask you put on daily might as well be saran wrap, because I see right through it. I'm very thankful of the fact that you are trying to spread God's word, but please don't make it your last resort for making people think you're the fantastic person you're not. If you didn't know, it's called using the Lord's name in vain. 

3.) FAKE

Simple, sweet, and to the point. STOP. BEING. FAKE. 

I'm purely enraged at the idea that you talk about one of my closest friends on the daily and then you go and try to pretend like you're always there for them and like you're a "true friend." You're a great person to my face, but God only knows who you are behind my back. 

**Luckily, my mother made my night better. As I was on Skype with one of my friends (video chat) she walks in asking if I want a present. 

Being the naive person I am, of course I say yes. Thinking that I'm about to get an awesome piece of candy or the keys to a new mustang, my mother hands me two condoms. 

Dear Mother, you are not the father figure I've never had, but thank you very much for trying to make up for the crappy husband/father figure that lives in our house.

Signed,

Greasy Bacon